Kelly Clarkson opened up about her true feelings towards her ex-husband, Brandon Blackstock, in the aftermath of their messy divorce. During an episode of the podcast, ‘We Can Do Hard Things with Glennon Doyle', the 'The Voice' coach candidly discussed the challenges they faced while co-parenting their two children, River Rose, 8, and Remington, 7.

Instead of a healthy dynamic, Kelly confessed to experiencing a constant emotional tug-of-war between love and frustration, ultimately realizing that moving away from such toxicity felt liberating. In her conversation on the podcast, Kelly delved deeper into the topic of dependency in relationships.

Kelly Clarkson's relationship with Brandon Blackstock was like a 'tug of war'

Clarkson expressed her belief that any form of reliance detracts from the essence of a loving connection. Rather than needing someone, Kelly emphasized that she actively chooses her partner. "If there's always this tug-of-war happening, like, 'Oh my god, I love you, but god, I hate you, you are just horrible.' That's not healthy," the 'American Idol' alum said. "That's just emotionally going 9-0…but you finally get away from that, and you realize how 'OK, this actually feels better,'" she added.

Kelly further revealed on the podcast, "Any kind of dependency [in a relationship], I feel like takes away from what the core loving relationship should be. No, I don't need you for any of that. I'm choosing you. "I could freely be giving it to anyone, and I'm freely giving it to you and only you. I think that's so beautiful…[and some] people don't agree."

‘The whole [relationship] was a rollercoaster’

Kelly also discussed her forthcoming album, 'Chemistry,' which draws inspiration from her divorce experience. While contemplating its track sequence, she reflected on the tumultuous nature of her relationship and concluded that sonically, starting from the beginning wouldn't capture the essence adequately. The ups and downs of their journey were better represented through a non-linear arrangement, mirroring the emotional rollercoaster they had endured. She said, "The whole [relationship] was a rollercoaster. It’s fine if the [track] sequencing is that…but that’s how you feel when you go through something."

Kelly and Brandon, who were married for seven years, went through a highly contentious divorce process, marked by a bitter legal battle over their assets. Eventually, they reached a settlement in March 2022, which required Kelly to pay over $1.3 million to her ex-husband and contribute $45,601 per month in child support for their shared children.

Kelly Clarkson's silver lining

Now seeking a fresh start, Kelly announced her decision to relocate her popular daytime talk show, 'The Kelly Clarkson Show,' from Los Angeles to New York City. On her show, she has been open about her personal struggles, acknowledging the unexpected challenges that 2020 brought into her life. "2020 has brought a lot of change also to my personal life. Definitely didn't see anything coming," she said.

Keeping the well-being of their children in mind, Kelly said, "But what I'm dealing with is hard because it involves more than just my heart. It involves a lot of little hearts." She continued, "You know, we have four kids, and divorce is never easy, and we're both from divorced families, so we know the best thing here is to protect our children and their little hearts." It's worth noting that Kelly also embraced her role as a stepmother to Brandon's two children from his previous marriage to Melissa Ashworth White—Savannah, 21, and Seth, 16.